Today Fran and I went to the Police Station. Here's how things went down.

Me: I want to file a police report for some credit card fraud.
Them: What fraud?
Me: Someone has being purchasing copious amounts of internet porn with my debit card.
Them: Oh. Well you need the receipts for the purchases.
Me: The companies will not provide me with any infomation without a subpoena, because they are scandelous, shady companys.
Them: Well, you need receipts or we won't file the report.
Me: But they won't give me the receipts. I have my bank statements of the charges. Isn't that enough? I called the precinct earlier and they said that was fine!
Them: You need the receipts.
Me: So these companies can fraudulently bill me, and as long as they don't provide me with the receipt, they are in the clear because you won't let me file charges?
Them: (speaking very slowly as if I am a retard) I won't fill out the paperwork unless you have receipts. Go to 1 Police Plaza. They have a computer division.
Me: (speaking very slowly) Thank you for your help you fat cunt.

So that was my day! Poor Fran had to walk away while I was arguing with the po-lice, she was surely afraid that my head would explode, or even worse my karma might be catching.

On another note, I am 99% sure I am going to move back west. Fran is going to move into my apartment.