I don't even know how to respond to this:

Hi

Here is my situation and what I am looking for. I just started a relationship with a woman, and we need a place to meet for a few months while she is in the process of buying a new home. (I am attached and therefore we cannot meet at my house.) We have been using hotels but that can get expensive and it is also somewhat restrictive in terms of meeting times. While we would be spending the occasional night in your apartment, we would not be living there. In fact, she has a child and therefore we would probably never be in the apt on Mon, Tues, or Friday nights and rarely on the weekends. For that reason, if you wanted to leave some of your personal stuff in a closet, that would be no problem. Similarly, if you felt comfortable, you could leave what decorations you wish since we would not be doing any decorating of our own. Obviously we need a furnished apt, and your apt is in a great neighborhood which is why I responded to your ad - although my friend lives in SF and I do not yet know whether she is willing to travel to your neighborhood.

Here are the additional particulars about our situation. She is 42 years old, has an MBA, and is an independent business consultant. I am 53, a lawyer, and I work in SF. I own a house, and I am also a landlord so I understand your concerns about subletting. I have no problem in paying your landlady in advance and in giving you a one month deposit. You may also run a credit check or check me out on the web site of the State Bar. Of course, this kind of arrangement might be upsetting to your landlady but if it is something you would consider let me know, and I will check with my partner about her interest. Thanks. John.