I really don't have anything funny to say. I could quote my mom again though, because she's always funny. A few days ago my parents came to visit me and we were all in the car together and I said something or other and my mom says, "You are weird."
I was shocked. I said, "Why am I weird?!?"
She replied, "Probably because you were badly brought up."
BA-DA-BING.
Lately I have been noticing a trend in my life. Consumption is the only thing that makes me happy. So I eat like a sow and shop till I drop. The problem with this equation is that I have no money so I can't actually shop. I like the idea, though. I have myself convinced that it's okay because it makes me a good american and that because we are on a "high terror alert" the only way to respond is to shop more. I just want to buy underwear that says, "I put out, just not for you." I told the Liz about this plan and she said she will just make me a shirt that says that because that way someone will actually see it. As it stands, the only person that sees my underwear that isn't one of my split personalities is my landlord who seems to let himself into my apartment when I am at school on a near-daily basis. This provides me with hours and hours of musing and trying to figure out precisely what he is doing and where the puddles may be.
Thanks to Tracy for making me update. Keep talking about those things you talk about, girl.
Wow. I am sleepy and it is only midnight. Go figure. Thinking about English literature and underwear all day really takes a lot out of a girl. Sigh.
i'm sure that in days to come i'll find myself shouting PUDENDA! at random.
maggie | December 6, 2002 1:24 PMHmmm pudendum... My favorite snack food! ;-) Really!! Low in calories and VERY high in entertainment value!
Gregoire | November 30, 2002 5:39 AMNo Update. Okay Pete, remain calm, there must be something else to look at on the internet?
I guess...
www.fatbaldmandancesnakedbycandlelight.net
Pete | November 27, 2002 4:27 PMI've been without internet access for about two weeks. When I came back, I only had to catch up on one Lina post.
I'm glad to see the internet, despite earlier claims to the contrary, can not continue functioning without me.
steveo | November 26, 2002 6:37 PMmy own pudendum story-----
english lit 110 studying Leaves of Grass under a professor who enjoyed describing Thoreau's use of alliteration as a "visceral farting of language."
"whitman's description of the wet beards on the men in the river evokes an image of female pudendum"
A look of disgust crosses the face of the Freshman sorority girl sitting next to me as her back stiffens in her chair.
"Gross. I can't BELIEVE he used the word PUDENDUM in CLASS!"
At least she knew what it meant
name shall remain heless | November 25, 2002 10:42 AMWhat the shit is that tank-top all about? I'm sure that must be illegal, even in the US?
I've reported you to the Royal Society for the Protection of Animals, just in case one of the poor little mites catches a glimps while passing a computer terminal.
The FBI have asked me to stop ringing them, and suggested that I get a e'fin life. But why both when I have Lina, and anyway they didn't do anything about your use of gliders in place of normal accessories.
pete | November 24, 2002 7:50 AMthat was truly the most bizarre thing I have ever read in my entire life. Don'tcha think, Leeny-poohs?
k | November 23, 2002 6:17 PM5438948
I'd like to see the T-shirt when you have it, not the pants (Oh, well if you insist).
Oh I know that means trousers in Amerenglish don't it Y'all. I is down wit' it in'ting.
Yay, for having a second languge!
Pete | November 23, 2002 12:03 PMThanks for taking the time to educate this little corner of the world. I have to admit I've never used pudendum to describe anyone, however I shall be looking for opertunities from now on.
I knew I had to comment just so you could reach you target. It's nice to have resonable asperations and so all the best with reaching you goal. Only 5438949 to go!
I too would like to kknow a little about you decidadly 'iffy' landlord? ...as would the FBI and State Police. (Did I get that right? did I? Did I?)
A close friend (Sam) once had a simular visitor, unfortunatly along with searching through her things to find the rent she'd hidden for him. He'd also spare a moment from his busy schedule to touch him self with her underwear! It was a whole hair colour thing!!! She had to work it out the hard way.
pete | November 23, 2002 11:55 AMi like that you call me "the liz". it is good.
i think you need to tell us more about your fancy panties.
the wing | November 22, 2002 8:34 AMI am also physically attracted to Lina
Rich | November 22, 2002 7:49 AMthank you for updating. now only the top of m&m's pointy skull invades my screen. you have to remember, those of us who don't have websites or who don't live perilously close to IKEA, live vicariously through you. in the words of g.w. bush, "With great power comes great responsibility".
kevin | November 21, 2002 7:57 PMYou aren't the only one, buddy.
Lina | November 21, 2002 5:22 PMI have found myself attracted to Fran
Rich | November 21, 2002 3:36 PMI'm happy to say that I have tried to incorporate "pudendum" or the adjective form of the word "pudendal" (still not quite sure how to use that one though) in my vocabulary daily. Thankyouverymuch.
maryisstrange | November 21, 2002 2:14 PMGawd, I was beginning to worry. Please update more often. When I read your site, I am reminded not to post sappy love poems and whining tributes on my own. I try to be funny, like you. Try, I said.
franny | November 21, 2002 1:53 PMunderwear and english lit.
these are a few of my favorite things....
ian | November 21, 2002 9:22 AMyou're! dammit! i hate when i make that mistake.
tracy | November 21, 2002 8:39 AMYour welcome. And thanks for updating. Wheeeee!
tracy | November 21, 2002 8:39 AM